I’m sure we’ve all heard some rendition of that phrase “if you love them, you gotta let them go.” It’s a terribly cliche saying and sometimes a trap we fall into as a way of coping; do we really have to let go?
I’m not entirely sure this phrase is true or even applicable for most. Why isn’t there a saying that says “If you love them, you should work hard as hell to make things work”? I really would like to believe that the saying came from someone who only knew unrequited love and had to create a way for himself or herself to cope. Despite all that, you find people telling you this when you’ve been dumped or if you’re in a situation where it seems like you’ll have to end a relationship. Well, fuck that. You letting go is quitting, and if that’s the kind of message we want to send then I’d say we’re all doomed.
Don’t get me wrong; I don’t believe quitting is a bad thing. Sometimes knowing when to quit is a bigger talent; however, don’t give me this bullshit that you gotta let go because you love them.
If you love someone, you work to find an answer. You work to find a solution. If that solution is to part ways, then so be it but do not leave the person because you love them. That’s probably the most selfish piece of nonsensical crap I’ve ever heard. It’s a person’s way of saying I have a get-out-of-jail free card and running away under the pretense that this is a self-sacrificial thing. Cut the crap. If you’re going to run, just run.
If you’ve loved before, you know there is something of a charging bull in your heart that pretty much doesn’t let you stop. You go to the end of the world and back trying to figure out an answer. Well let me tell you something: when some one asks you why you’re walking away, just let them know that you’ve tried everything you could and that this was the best solution you could compromise on. No one is higher or mightier to say that “I’m letting you go.” Fuck, we don’t live in an uncivilized society (or at least I truly wish we didn’t).
Whatever the case may be, if you love something or someone and you’ve got a road block, fuckin fight for it. If it’s not worth fighting for, then don’t make it seem like you tried to and own up to that. We don’t live in a perfect society and there’s no way that you can embody perfection. Ultimately, you let go of the other person because you or the both of you failed. Yes, failed. It’s not a bad thing. We fail all the time. Learn from it and grow from it. That’s what failure is for so no shame there.